The Foreign and Commonwealth Office (FCO) has released the weirdest questions its staff has been asked by travellers who are in trouble.
The bizarre list includes someone who rang to ask for Phil Collin's phone number and Prince Charles's shoe size.
The records also showed that staff in Spain were asked by a man to contact a dominatrix who had left him stranded in an airport.
Further examples include a British man who rang the consulate in Sydney to ask what clothes he should pack and another who asked a consulate in Greece for information on how to put a chicken coop in his garden.
The FCO today reminded British travellers of the role of its global network of Embassies, High Commissions and Consulates as staff continue to be asked questions about the best fishing spots and where to get Christmas lunch.
"We're not directory inquiries," Britain's Foreign Office proclaimed in a statement Thursday.
"We wanted to draw attention to things that we actually can help with," Charles Hay, director of consular services at the Foreign Office, told The Associated Press. "One way of doing that is to detail some of the other requests we get and discourage callers from making these types of requests."
Other odd requests made to the consulates include a Brit who rang up to try and get a consulate to sell his house for him and another who asked staff in Dubai to meet his dog at the airport and help the pet through customs.
One woman complained to the embassy in Moscow about a loud buzzing noise in her apartment and asked if they could do anything about it. A man also called in Florida to report that there were ants in his holiday villa and asked what he should do.
"We will always try to help where we can but there are limits to the support that we can provide," said Consular Affairs Minister Jeremy Browne.
"It is important that people understand the level of help we can offer.
"Our priority is to help people in real difficulty abroad and we cannot do this if our time is diverted by people trying to use us as a concierge service.
"We need to be able to focus primarily on helping victims of serious crimes, supporting people who have been detained or assisting people who have lost a loved one abroad."
Staff from the FCO handle around two million consular inquiries a year.