Is Having a Boyfriend Embarrassing Now? Vogue's Viral Question Sparks TikTok Firestorm
Gen Z influencers and singles weigh in as Vogue's dating commentary ignites a cultural debate

Vogue's latest dating essay has ignited a cultural firestorm across TikTok and beyond. In her article titled 'Is Having a Boyfriend Embarrassing Now?', writer and cultural commentator Chanté Joseph explores a growing shift in how young women present—or deliberately obscure—their romantic relationships online. But it was her own TikTok reaction that truly lit the match: 'The days of a man being a prize has changed,' she said, echoing a sentiment that resonated with millions.
From Think Piece to Meme: How the Trend Took Off
Published in late October, Joseph's article examines the decline of boyfriend-centric content on social media. Once a badge of honor, public coupledom is now being replaced by 'soft launches,' cropped photos, and cryptic captions. The shift, she argues, reflects a cultural recalibration: women no longer see having a boyfriend as a status symbol or personal achievement.
Joseph's own TikTok account, @chantayyjayy, became the epicenter of the trend. In a now-viral video, she playfully summarized the article's thesis with a single line: 'The days of a man being a prize has changed.' The clip sparked thousands of stitches and duets, with creators across the platform parodying relationship reveals, sharing personal stories, or simply nodding in agreement. The hashtag #EmbarrassingBoyfriend has since exploded, turning Vogue's question into a meme-fueled cultural moment.
The Decline of the 'Boyfriend Flex'
At the heart of the discourse is a generational shift in values. For Gen Z, privacy is power—and performative relationships are passé. Posting a boyfriend too soon is seen as risky. Oversharing is cringe. And centering a man in one's digital narrative? Often viewed as a step backward.
This shift isn't just aesthetic—it's ideological. As Joseph writes, 'Being partnered doesn't affirm your womanhood anymore.' Increasingly, women are choosing to center their own identity, creativity, and independence rather than define themselves through romantic relationships. The boyfriend, once a symbol of social achievement, has become a quiet footnote—present but often hidden, and no longer the centerpiece of a woman's public life.
@chantayyjayy So many thoughts! This is my 2AM summary please go and read ❤️
♬ original sound - Chanté Joseph
TikTok's Take: Humor, Honesty, and Heat
TikTok's response has been layered and lively. Some users posted satirical videos hiding their boyfriends behind furniture or blurring their faces. Others offered sincere reflections on why they keep their relationships private. A few pushed back, arguing that love should be celebrated, not hidden.
Still, the dominant tone has been one of self-awareness. Many creators used the trend to critique outdated gender dynamics and question why women are still expected to 'prove' their desirability through partnership. Joseph's quote became a rallying cry for those who see value in decentering men from their personal narratives.
What This Says About Dating in 2025
The viral reaction to Vogue's article reveals a deeper cultural reckoning. In a world where identity is curated online, the decision to post—or not post—a partner is political. It's about control, boundaries, and the refusal to let romantic status define personal worth.
Whether this trend marks a permanent shift or a passing moment, one thing is clear: the rules of modern dating are being rewritten in real time. And in 2025, the idea that a boyfriend is the ultimate prize? That's what's really embarrassing.
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