The Revenant Leonardo DiCaprio
Star turn: Leonardo DiCaprio in The Revenant 20th Century Fox

Finally. On the fifth time of asking, at the 88th Academy Awards, Leonardo DiCaprio at last won a Best Actor Oscar for The Revenant, the 15th best performance of his career. The widely-expected win was the show's penultimate prize, and the moment the whole evening had been leading up to.

DiCaprio's losing streak had been the stuff legend, spawning countless memes and becoming award season's second longest running joke - behind the Academy's enormous diversity problems in both its membership and nominations. Now though, all the dank memes must be consigned to the archives of the internet - doomed to gather dust alongside Dramatic Chipmunk and Keyboard Cat.

In recognition of Leo's big night, we've listed a few of things he'll be able to do now he has reached Hollywood's summit and collected his first golden statuette, which can now take its place alongside the 44 other acting prizes the 41-year-old has won.


All of Leo's dedicated fans, who in the past wished so hard for a win they busted blood vessels in their heads, who were outraged after he lost to Matthew McConaughey two years ago - what if the bitter cherry on top of their beloved's triumph was his immediate retirement?

Why not? He's done it all now. He has nothing left to prove. Perhaps this Oscar was all he ever wanted. Maybe he doesn't even like acting. Now he's reached the top, maybe Leo will pack it all in to become a full-time environmental activist or supermodel, err... companion.

Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio
Kate Winslet congratulates Leonardo DiCaprio as he wins the Best Actor Oscar Getty Images

Stop being seen in public with Kate Winslet at every opportunity because it's good PR

Every time Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio have been in the same room as each other these past few months, a thousand news stories were hurriedly written about them hugging, or laughing at a funny joker, or slaughtering a village together, all because they were once in a film people like.

There aren't this many stories when Nicolas Cage and John Travolta are in the same room, and they were in Face/Off, the undisputed best film of 1997. Cram it, Titanic!

Star in raunchy, gross-out comedies with Zac Efron

For too long Leo has sat on the side-lines watching Robert DeNiro and Seth Rogen get all the parts he's wanted, but been unable to take, because of the irreparable damage it would do to his Oscar chances. Now he can cut loose and sign on to shoot the movie he's always dreamed of doing – a raunchy comedy about a summer camp located between a bra factory, a librarian convention and a marijuana plantation.

Stop doing charity work

Leo's charity work has always offset any damage to his public persona that might arise due to his continuing efforts to become the world champion of sex with supermodels. He even used last night's acceptance speech to talk about climate change and the very real threat it poses to humanity.

Now he's won though, he can pump the breaks on the PR war machine and take a break from his tireless efforts to save the human race. Buy a diesel mate, spit your chewing gum out on the street, start a little forest fire. Relax.

Settle down and start a family

Not likely, there are too many supermodels.