'People Were Triggered': Olivia Wilde On Harry Styles Romance Backlash And Online Fury

Olivia Wilde says people were 'triggered' by her relationship with Harry Styles, arguing that the backlash to their high‑profile romance exposed deeper issues around fan culture, gender expectations and how society views mothers. Reflecting on the reaction on the Call Her Daddy podcast, the actress and director suggested much of the fury said more about audiences' 'parasocial' attachment to celebrities than about the couple themselves.

Speaking with host Alex Cooper, Wilde, 39, discussed the scrutiny that followed her relationship with the former One Direction star, which began while filming Don't Worry Darling and ended in 2023. She said that for some fans, the sense of emotional ownership they felt over Styles fed into the anger directed at her.

'It had very little to do with me,' she said. 'I don't know how much I understand it yet. I think it was something we have done to women for a long time.'

'We Had the Loveliest Relationship'

Despite the online backlash at the time, Wilde insisted her relationship with Styles was positive and largely insulated from outside commentary.

'We had the loveliest relationship. Like so, so sweet and so beautiful, and really, actually very domestic and kind and lovely,' she said. 'We existed in this little bubble, and the judgment never really got into that bubble — which was a miracle.'

She acknowledged, however, that public reaction often intensified when the couple appeared happy in public.

'I would go to his shows and dance, and people were like, "Oh, how could she?" How dare you dance and smile,' she said.

Backlash Over Age Gap And Motherhood

Wilde and Styles' relationship drew widespread attention in part because of their 10‑year age gap and Wilde's status as a mother of two children with ex-partner Jason Sudeikis.

Wilde suggested the scrutiny reflected a broader cultural expectation that women, particularly mothers, should no longer be seen as sexual or romantically independent figures.

In the interview, she referenced psychotherapist Esther Perel, arguing that there is still a 'puritanical basis' in how society views women after motherhood.

'In this country, motherhood means, "No more sexual being for you, young lady,"' she said.

'A Parasocial Relationship With Him'

Wilde also said part of the backlash stemmed from the intense public attachment to Styles, describing it as a burden carried by many modern celebrities.

She said fans often struggle to separate personal feelings from reality, particularly when it comes to high‑profile pop stars with devoted followings. That dynamic, she suggested, contributed to the emotional response around her relationship and its visibility.

Olivia Wilde And Harry Styles: How Their Romance Unfolded

Wilde and Styles first met on the set of Don't Call Me Darling in September 2020. However, it was only in 2021 that they became official. A source told People that Wilde and Styles started as good friends, but their relationship quickly turned romantic. While on the set of their film, the two always hung out and visited each other's trailers.

Throughout the next two years, Wilde and Styles were photographed together in public on multiple occasions. They attended the premiere of their film together and went on a handful of vacations. Wilde and Styles were also spotted engaging in PDA several times, and they were very public about their love and fondness for each other.

Before the exes got together, Wilde was engaged to Sudeikis. But in 2020, they decided to call off their engagement and went their separate ways. Sources revealed that Styles had nothing to do with the split because the engagement was called off in early 2020.